Lost: How To Introduce Characters

[image] A lot could be said for the plot twists in Lost and many would not chose the word "planned" to describe them. Over the last series + 4eps they've added a massive number of characters, most of which seem like they're in it to stay... That is until they're done for

A lot could be said for the plot twists in Lost and many would not chose the word "planned" to describe them.

Over the last series + 4eps they've added a massive number of characters, most of which seem like they're in it to stay... That is until they're done for drinking under the influence and have to be written out in some sort of crazy mishap.

I'll try not to say too much about last night's episode but you should remember these two marvels of evolution from last week's: Looks-A-Bit-Like-Anna-Marie and Could-Be-Mistaken-For-Sawyer-On-A-Dark-Night.

Their story is they've been with the front section of the plane from the very beginning and they've never done anything special enough to get noticed. There have been others like them but last week they decided they'd take it upon themselves just to start talking. When seeing their blatant rudeness I physically shouted (albeit it quietly) at the screen asking why the hell ABC want to make this more complicated than it is and then it dawned on me that ABC may have found the key to a perpetual money-maker. Here's the science bit:

Lost S1 got lots of viewers because it asked lots of questions
Viewers = Advertising money
Therefore: Questions = Money and Money = Questions

What we are seeing here is ABC trying to add a couple more people so they can add a couple more flashback storylines, which they'll no doubt use to ask a few more timely questions.

But why don't we get bored of all their cocking around though? Well some people do but the majority are falling for what ABC no-doubt considers "answers" but I think they're following the following science that:

Answers = Questions * 0
Answers = 0(Money) = 0

So instead they've come up with:

Answers + 2*Question = 0(Money) + 2(Money)
= Twice the money.

It's pure genius.

Written by Oli on Thursday, 02 November 2006. Tagged with lost, funny. Read 2938 times. If you liked it, please give it a digg.

#1 /* 2 years, 0 months ago */

He's hit the Jackpot!

The ultimate question: What the hell is the point of lost? Is it to inform and enlighten like a documentary...mmmm nope. Is it to entertain...like 24..mmm nope! ITS TO MAKE MONEY!! Stop this now by not watching lost! It is evil and uses you as screen fodder. Best ABC by not caring about the questions, just the same as beating tele-sales by inviting them round EVERYTIME they ring and NEVER buying anything. Watch them all panic when they have to come up with a product you actually want!

Remember kids,
Lost is evil. Don’t watch it.
Tele marketing should work.
Only you can stop the madness.

Here is the science of the antidote:

Questions you don’t care for = no money for ABC = end of show = answers!

Telesales + constant visits + no sales = no telesales.

The only way to get REAL answers from ABC is to not care about the answers.

The only way to beat telemarketing is invite them all round for tea.

These guys are beating us with woman logic, now’s the time to fight back.

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